Give Trust First
If You Want to Get What You Want Out of a Relationship, Trusting Him is Critical
Is your relationship in jeopardy or under stress because of constant disagreements and arguments with your man where he doesn’t seem to listen or care?
Are you worried that you can’t seem to reach any common ground because every time you bring up what you’re feeling or what you want, he gets irritated with you?
As if YOU are the one with the problem?
As if you are wrong to disagree with him about anything, or wrong to say how you feel about something?
If you’re like most sensible women, then all you really want is a little understanding.
I know how painful and frustrating it can be when the ONLY thing that seems to be getting in the way of a close and lasting connection with your man is some recurring misunderstandings.
But I’m about to give you two secrets that will improve the way you communicate and stop the downward spiral of fighting today.
The reason most men react negatively when you try and talk about your relationship is because they feel criticized by you.
Men want to know that you think they are perfect. More importantly, men want to know that who they are and how they act pleases you.
That’s why when you tell them about something that’s hurt your feelings or is “wrong”, they feel like they aren’t pleasing you, and that you aren’t happy with them.
“The thing that’s most important to a man in a relationship is that he knows that who he is makes his woman HAPPY.”
Of course, that’s when a man will go to trying to “fix” whatever is wrong. Because he must find a way to make it right so he knows that he still pleases the woman in his life.
The thing that’s most important to a man in a relationship is that he knows that who he is makes his woman HAPPY.
So, knowing all these important insights into how men think and feel, what can you do with it to put it to use in your relationship?
To stop this cycle of a man feeling criticized, or like he doesn’t please you, you first need to find a “safe space” before you talk and share your feelings with him. That means telling him what you’re feeling or what you need without criticism, judgment, or drama.
Have you ever noticed that if you’re in a neutral, quiet mood, and a friend calls and is all ecstatic about some good news, you will automatically start to smile and chuckle along?
Or if your friend calls and sounds depressed and negative, you will get off the phone feeling worse than you felt before they called?
This is because emotions are contagious, and they usually transfer themselves from the strong emotions (joy, depression) to the less intense emotions (quiet, contemplative).
So why is this important to know when it comes to better communication and less arguing?
If you approach your man with an angry, upset or irritated attitude, he is less likely to respond to what you’re saying, or even listen intently. He will just mirror your emotion. That’s why it’s important to communicate in a neutral attitude, so that he can actually LISTEN to what it is you’re saying, not just react to your emotions.
In my eBook Catch Him and Keep Him, I’ll give you an action plan for creating a “safe” space to communicate with your guy. I’ll also tell you the kind of words and body language a man will be most receptive to so you don’t perpetuate the cycle of negative emotions.
Download your copy here: Catch Him and Keep Him risk free trial. Try it RISK FREE for seven days and learn how YOU can affect how your next conversation will go - whether it will spiral into fighting and negativity… or end up in a much closer connection and better understanding.